What To Expect!
You Need To Let Go Of To Be Able To Move Forward In Life?
If you fear losses, you’ll never win. learn to tolerate losses, learn to lose well..
Permit me to steal this quote from Michael Jordan. “I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all – in which case, you fail by default. One thing I need to let go of to move forward is: my “fear of failure” and “over-cautiousness” if that’s even a word. I believe my phobia for losses is one thing I need to let go of to be able to move forward in life. The question is, how? How do I… Have I even lived? I remember my days as a skateboarder and how I couldn’t even ollie because I was too cautious to lift myself off the floor or how as a dancer I couldn’t… what’s the word they used “dance large” because I was too cautious. This has affected me in all areas of life even in art. Favour, how do I go about being less “too-cautious” or being able to accept defeat. Where do I get this courage from?
Dear Favor, You’re not obligated to win. You’re obligated to keep trying. To the best you can do everyday. There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure. What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything? I know that, believe me. It’s just that this is how I was brought up. I’d remember days when I came 15th in class. Mom embarrassed me, I felt like a loser. I can’t blame her though… that’s the only way she knew. Now, it’s affecting me. I hate to fail.
Dear Favour, I think perfection is ugly. Somewhere in the things humans make, I want to see scars, failure, disorder, distortion. Throw away your eraser. I think erasers shouldn’t even exist because what are you trying to clean? The marking never leaves. A broken cup will always stay cracked but you can always fire another one. Right? Do you remember how in primary 3 you started using pen after you graduated from pencil. How did you learn to clean the errors? You crossed it over. Why do you even think they made that a thing? Favour, life is the art of drawing without an eraser. Ergo, mistakes are forgiven, but only in pencil.
I’ll ask you this. What is your definition of failure? I mean in school it was carrying last and you got your a.s.s whooped. How about now? What was your definition of failure as a dancer? What was it as an artist, and finally, what was it as a skateboarder? What’s your definition of failure that you’re so scared of it? As a trader, what’s your definition of it?
My definition of failure as a dancer was to not “murder” a beat. That of art was not depicting the right picture. Skating, not being able to do some tricks, and now trading not being able to consistently make profits. Great! lovely responses… I love how honest you were. Now Favour, another question. Did you try? I mean really try. Did you pick it up and after a while you dropped it and made up your mind that, “oh, well it was fun while it lasted”. When did you know that you have failed?
You actually gave up. Maybe you weren’t so passionate about them, maybe your why wasn’t strong enough or maybe… you just weren’t patient and consistent. Favour you’ll always miss 100% of the shots you don’t take becaue inaction breeds doubt and fear. Hwowevr, action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get consistent. The greatest mistake you can make in life is to continually be afraid you will make one. Maybe your doubt isn’t such a bad thing because… The greater the artist, the greater the doubt. However, you only fear that which you’ve convinced your mind of.
My dearest Favour, you are not a failure. Losses are inevitable in trading, and every artist is unique. Now you know what you ned to let go of. So…
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