Fear Or Shame What Will You Do Now?
do not regret..
If I didn’t feel shame or fear. Hmm.. I really don’t know. If you asked me this last year, I’d give you an answer. But now, I have already said, “F it”. I’ve asked and received, taken risk and learnt its lessons. I am doing everything I have always wanted to do and still doing them. My daily routine and activity have helped me to handle my shame and fear better.
Dear Favour, I think this time, I am fine. Fine with my current activities. How much more can I ask for? Favour, I am grateful. I have a five figure trading account, a mac, stable wifi connection, light, a trading system, phone, and lately, I have been following my rules diligently. I don’t feel shame or fear. I feel great.
My fear or shame stemmed from my weakness (fear of failure) or so I thought. Today, I learnt that if you’re scared of failure, then you’re scared of learning. I felt like I didn’t need to show my losses or talk about my fears. The more I spoke on it, the better I felt. So it became a habit. Now, I talk about my losses, fears, and i’ve seen growth.. Favour, I’m at peace. For the very first time in my life, I’m at peace with my imperfections and losses.
Dearest Favour, I am working on myself and i’ve seen progress. Before I forget, yesterday, I stayed calm. I didn’t take that trade even when tempted to. I did it! I controlled it. The urge I feel, the addiction, “I” controlled it. Although i’m still in a bit of a drawdown due to my previous urges, I am at peace knowing: I will come back on top and more. I’ve learnt to face my problems and not give it to other people. The better I get at this, the more stronger I become.
I will make it. I’m sure of it. Dear Favour, I don’t feel shame or fear. I’m at peace..
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